It’s so cold.

Wind whipped Marie Daniels as she trudged along the snow covered shoulder of a two lane highway.  Massive drifts rose almost to her head beside her, remnants from the last pass of the snowplow. The next pass could bury her. Her teeth chattered. The flimsy pair of nylon boots, jeans, and knitted sweater did nothing to combat the bite of the wind. Snow matted her hair and tears froze on her cheeks.

You should never have left.

She came to terms with the fact that she was most likely going to die out here, but it was better than staying at the house with Randy. Especially after she hit him in the head with a vase. You bitch! Get back here! His voice still rang in her ears.

Ella. The name popped into her thoughts like a balloon expanding. She spent a large portion of her time thinking about a name for her unborn daughter and narrowed it down to five: Carla, Penelope, Frances, Wendy and Ella. She was going to wait until she saw the girl but now, standing in the middle of nowhere with snow accumulating around her, she decided on Ella.

Headlights broke through the darkness ahead, dull in the distance. Shit, it’s him. She glanced at the drift beside her and contemplated scrambling over it. The snow and ice was loose and she knew a twelve foot wide ditch sat on the other side. Not happening. The other side of the street was too exposed: an old wooden fence leading to the open expanse of a field. 

As the car approached, one crucial element filled her with hope—the headlights were too small and low to the ground to possibly belong to Randy’s massive pick-up truck. That hope quickly dissolved as she saw the glint of metal from a set of cherry lights on top. Norfolk County Police. There were only two such cars in their town.

Marie sighed as it pulled up beside her, the light bar flashing red and blue. She peered through the windshield to see Officer Sanderson staring back at her, his bushy moustache hiding a scowl. As soon as the car stopped, he leaned over and flicked the handle on the passenger side. It popped open with a squawk and a blast of warm air rushed out. Marie stood her ground in the ice chunks and snow.

“What do you think you’re doin’?” Officer Sanderson asked.

“Gettin’ some air, Bert.”

“He hit you again?”

Marie didn’t dignify that with a response. 

“I’ll take you where you need to go.” He wasn’t going to stop. He never did.

Shivering, Marie slid onto the front seat, pulling the door closed behind her. The cab felt toasty and comfy and only smelled a little of cigarette smoke. She shoved her numb fingers in front of the air vents belching out warm air. Officer Sanderson shifted into gear and the car lurched forward. Marie’s body pressed into the door as he turned the wheel sharply to the right, performing a U-turn to head in the direction she was walking.

“Bein’ out here in your current condition is extremely stupid, you know,” Officer Sanderson added, glaring at her. His gaze lingered a little longer on her belly.

“Don’t worry, she’s fine,” Marie said. I hope. “I didn’t tell you where I was headed.”

“You didn’t. I’m taking you back to the station,” Officer Sanderson said.

“What! Why? I didn’t do nothin’!” Marie screeched, the echoes in the small car rang in her ears. You did nothin’ he didn’t deserve.

“Randy’s sayin’ you hit him with a vase. Says he’s bleedin’ pretty badly,” Officer Sanderson replied.

“You know him, he’s always exaggeratin’—” Marie’s breath caught in her throat when a sharp pain jabbed her stomach. Then, just as fast as it came, it was gone.

“You OK?” he asked.

“Yeah. Can’t you just drop me off at my brother’s? We don’t need to go to the station.”

“Gary’s out of town and I can’t leave you alone in this weather. So why don’t you tell me what happened as we finish the ride?” Officer Sanderson bargained.

Nothing out of the ordinary. That wasn’t what Officer Sanderson was looking for. But he won’t understand the truth. Like Randy won’t understand either.

“Fine then,” Officer Sanderson said, flicking on the radio as Marie nestled into her seat.

 

* * * * *

 

“You ever wonder, you know, how many people are reading the exact same page of a book as you?” Gary asked, staring at a paltry bookshelf.

Marie rolled her eyes. Her brother could be such a dork. Cool autumn air drifted in through the window behind her as she pulled another toke on a joint, exhaling and passing it to Randy. They were huddled around a coffee table in Randy’s living room, Marie and Gary sitting on a ratty couch, Randy in a well-worn lazy boy.

“Why do you do that?” Randy asked as he accepted the joint.

“What?” Gary asked.

“Ask the dumbest questions,” Randy said with an exhale. Instead of passing the remainder to Gary, he squished the tip out between his thumb and forefinger and pocketed the rest.

“Hey man!” Gary protested.

“Don’t worry. I’ve got something better,” Randy said, reaching in the breast pocket of his flannel shirt and pulling out a small baggie filled with an assortment of coloured pills.

Marie’s eyes widened when she recognized them: ecstasy. “Where’d you get those?”

“That’s none of your business but, if the trip is good, know that I’ll be able to get more,” Randy said.

“That’s what I’m talkin’ about!” Gary exclaimed, rubbing his hands together as he leaned forward to snatch the baggie from Randy. Randy pulled it back, leaving Gary grasping at thin air.

“Not so fast. This shit’ll fuck you up.”

Gary scoffed but sat back, knowing the drill.

“Now let’s not make the same mistake as last time. We should just take half a pill, see how it goes,” Randy explained as he took a pill out of the baggie and retrieved a pocket knife from his pants pocket. He sliced it and held out the halves for Gary and Marie.

Marie plucked one out of his hand but resisted ingesting it right away. He’d get angry if you did that. There was a ceremony to these events. Randy took a full pill out of the bag before resealing it and putting it in a box beneath the coffee table. Then he held the pill up as if it were communion. “To a helluva ride.”

Marie tossed the pill in her mouth and washed it down with a swig of slightly warm beer. As she swallowed, Gary guzzled the rest of his beer. When he finished, he belched and then looked at the other two. “How long does it take?”

“You think this shit’s instant?” Randy mocked.

“Seriously dude, I feel nothing,” Gary complained, studying his hands as if they might hold untold secrets.

“It takes time. Here,” Randy opened the mini fridge beside him and took out a couple more beers, tossing one to Gary and putting another on the table in front of Marie. “Drink up. It’ll come.”

That’s what you always say. Marie swapped her warm beer for a cold one. “So what do we do now?”

Randy raised his eyebrows, then diverted his attention to Gary as he picked at crud beneath his fingernails. She cleared her throat, but Gary continued to pick away.

“Gary,” Marie said.

He looked up, like a deer caught in headlights, and lowered his hands to his lap. “What’s up? Whaddya need?”

“You need to, uh, go to the bathroom or somethin’?” Marie suggested, making her eyes wide and tilting her head to a skinny door leading to a dingy sink and toilet on the other side of the room.

“No not really,” Gary said with a smile.

Marie exhaled loudly.

“Then I’m gonna go,” Randy said, and pushed himself off the chair. Marie tried to hold him down but he brushed off her feeble attempt.

Guess he’s not in the mood. She chuckled to herself, shaking her head. She turned to Gary and noticed he was staring at her feet.

“Do you mind?” she asked, tucking her feet away. He was her brother for chrissakes.

“What?” He wasn’t looking at her feet, but at the box beneath the coffee table. He lifted his gaze and their eyes met. Don’t let him do it. Randy will get mad!

He stretched his bony fingers forward and snatched up the box like it was a bar of gold before she could stop him. He pried open the lid to reveal an assortment of trinkets, a few baggies of pot, and the bag of multicoloured pills. Gary plucked it out, holding it up to the light for closer inspection.

“How many do you want?” he asked, shaking the bag as if she were a cat and it was treats. “I’m not feeling anything yet.”

“He said it would take a while,” she reasoned. But she felt no different than when she took the pill. Half-pill. Perhaps it was a weak batch. 

The toilet flushed across the room. Time was short. He took a whole pill, why should he get that privilege! “K, gimme one,” Marie said, holding out her hand.

Gary grinned from ear to ear and tilted the bag, letting two pills fall onto her outstretched hand. He pulled the baggie back and took one of the pills for himself, before a tickle in his nose caused him to sneeze. The bag tilted again, spilling pills across the carpet. He looked up to Marie, his eyes wide.

“Get them! Hurry up!” she said, as the faucet in the bathroom turned off.

He crouched down and began collecting the pills back in the baggie. He retrieved all but two before the door from the bathroom opened and Randy emerged. Gary glanced between Randy, who’s back remained to the room as he closed the bathroom door, and the two pills lying amidst the pulls in the carpet. He quickly covered them with his hand as he tossed the filled baggie to Marie.

“What the fuck you doin’ on the floor?” Randy asked, turning around and wiping his hands on his jeans.

“Noffin,” Gary replied, pulling his hand off the carpet and popping both pills into his mouth.

Randy raised his eyebrows but didn’t press the subject, instead crossing the room and falling back into his chair. Gary grabbed his beer and took a long swig, washing down the evidence. “Want to listen to some music?”

 

* * * * * 

 

“You’re sayin’ he what?” Officer Sanderson asked, returning to his desk.

They were in the empty police station, with only a few lights on above his desk and in the kitchen. Officer Sanderson placed a cup of warm water in front of Marie. She delayed telling him the story as long as she could; boredom in the small space won out.

“He attacked me,” Marie said. “He was his drunk old self when I got home and got angry when I reminded him the baby wasn’t his, but a gift from the Others.” She was still on the fence about whether it was a gift or not, but that was part of a different discussion.

The atmosphere in the room chilled a couple degrees as Officer Sanderson exhaled loudly. “Not this shit again.”

“I thought you wanted the truth?” Marie asked.

“Listen, Marie, I was there that night. I don’t know how many times I have to tell you that nothing happened.”

“You were busy with Gary. You didn’t see what I saw,” Marie shot back.

Officer Sanderson opened his mouth to argue, but then shut it, choosing a different tactic. “So what did he do?”

“Grabbed my wrists when I told him I didn’t want to be around him and I was heading to Gary’s. He said the baby inside me is his and that he wants to be there for it.”

“But you don’t want him anymore,” Officer Sanderson said.

“He ain’t cleanin’ up his act! He told me he would but he’s worse than before. How am I supposed to raise her in that kinda environment?”

“Right. And you’ve cleaned up yours?” Always the skeptic.

“Of course! Since the day they sent me back. You know, I don’t think I was supposed to know what they were doin’ to me. They changed me. You know I haven’t done any drugs since I found out,” Marie explained, rubbing her belly.

“Doc Marshall’s checked on you how many times? Says there’s nothin’ abnormal with your pregnany,” Officer Sanderson reasoned, sipping his coffee.

Marie averted her gaze, looking out the darkened windows. They always act like this. Like you’re crazy. She winced as a searing pain coursed through her abdomen again. 

“You need to lie down?” Real concern in his voice.

Marie shook her head. “I need to go home, and you need to bring Randy here instead.”

“We’re not going anywhere in this weather now,” he said, nodding to the windows and the steadily accumulating snow. Big, thick flakes, coated every surface.

Great, now you’re stuck here with Officer Valiant. She sighed. You know he just wants to fuck you, right? Randy’s voice was grating in her ears.

“You got anything to eat then?” Marie asked.

Sanderson nodded as he pushed himself out of his chair, carrying his coffee with him as he walked over to the little kitchenette in the corner. Marie had been in the police station enough times that she could have grabbed the chocolate chunk cookies tucked behind the coffee beans easily enough—but sitting felt good, and the pain in her stomach lessoned when she wasn’t moving.

Officer Sanderson returned with the box of cookies and tossed them onto the table in front of Marie. She took one and nibbled on the end.

“You know, I can’t help you if you don’t tell me everything that happened tonight,” Officer Sanderson said, the chair squeaking as he leaned back.

“I’ve already told! Randy was high when I got home. I told him how he couldn’t keep doin’ that, that it won’t be good for the baby and he got angry. Really angry,” Marie sounded clinical. If Officer Sanderson thought she was detached from the situation, he may avoid further personal questions.

“And so he attacked you,” Officer Sanderson concluded.

“Yup, a cheatin’ whore ain’t allowed in this house’, he said,” Marie explained, putting her hands on her hips. “I didn’t know what else to tell him, except that it wasn’t his baby and that I had no control over the matter.”

“Hmmm,” Officer Sanderson said, snacking on another cookie.

If you’re not careful you’ll have a paunch bigger than my belly. She hid her smirk well. “If we’re gonna stay here, I might as well take you up on your offer to lie down,” Marie said, moreso just to get Officer Sanderson out of the room.

“Right.” He shot to his feet, scanning the room as if he didn’t know where he could find something to cushion one of the tables. The cots for the drunk tank are in the closet beside the bathroom. Some of them should be clean. Officer Sanderson crossed to the bathroom, where he disappeared around the corner.

Whether he was waiting for this moment or it was just blind luck, the front door to the station opened. A blast of cold air accompanied it, sending a shiver down her spine. Marie turned to the entrance. Even with blood turning his face into a red smear, she could tell it was Randy. And he didn’t look happy.

 

* * * * *

 

A knock at the door caused Marie to turn from the floral wallpaper, with little faeries dancing across the stems, to the door, which swirled and grew as she moved forward and back. “Whoah.”

Rock music blared from speakers on either side of the couch, but she swayed as if it were a slow dance. Out of the corner of her eye, Randy leaned over Gary as he lay on the floor. Gary’s feet spasmed, his heels thudding off the carpet.

Another knock at the door, pounding in sync with the music. “You gonna get that?”

Randy looked up, his eyes large. Startled. “How many more did he take?”

I’m not supposed to tell you. Marie giggled.

“Jesus,” Randy said, stalking over to the radio and turning it down. As the music faded, so did the pulsing in the wallpaper.

Randy entered a short hallway leading to the front door. Gary curled into a fetal position on the floor. Better him than me. Marie stepped toward Gary as the front door creaked open. The sound was accompanied by a flock of butterflies pouring into the room. “Ah-maazing,” Marie said, stumbling toward them. They weren’t butterflies, but multi-coloured specks of light. When she touched one, it disappeared.

“Can I help you, officer?” Randy’s voice drifted into the room. Officer? How interesting!

Marie danced her way over to the door, stepping over Gary. Gary’s hand lashed out and wrapped around her ankle. She looked down as he looked up. Oh brother, you’ve gone and fucked yourself up. Spittle ran from the corner of his mouth. 

“Randy, we’ve had a call about the noise,” the Officer responded. Marie recognized the voice immediately and stopped her forward progression. It was Sanderson.

She remembered their last interaction. He had picked her up for drunk and disorderly at the bar. Even though she may have been dancing on a table, it’s not like she was hurting anyone. He scolded her on her need to grow up, but eventually let her go with a warning. He wouldn’t be so kind when he saw Gary. “Shhh, quiet,” she said as she knelt down beside him.

“Right, right Officer. I apologize about that, I’ll turn it down some more,” Randy said at the doorway.

“Good,” Officer Sanderson replied. “Everything else OK here?”

“Yeah, Bert. I’ll keep the music down, don’t worry.”

An awkward silence ensued. Marie caught Gary’s gaze and didn’t like the blank expression in his eyes. His mouth opened and, before she could react, his voice filled the empty room. “Help me.”

Marie’s eyes shot to the entryway as footsteps approached.

“Bert, it’s nothing. You don’t need to worry about it,” Randy was saying. Pleading.

Officer Sanderson’s footsteps continued to approach. Marie sat back on the floor with a thud. Gary’s head bounced off the linoleum. What rounded the corner weren’t humans, but grotesque creatures with red eyes and snarling mouths filled with sharp teeth. Their skin was black and leathery and hairy and stank. Thick muscles tensed and twitched with every movement.

You gotta get out of here! The bull-beasts stomped forward, the ground vibrating with each step. Marie pushed herself back. Sorry Gary, every woman for herself!

“What did he take?” The closest beast had Sanderson’s voice, but the jaw moved in all the wrong directions.

Marie wiped her eyes but it didn’t help. One beast hovered over Gary while the other paced behind it. She couldn’t take it anymore. She pushed herself up and ran to the couch. A window sat high in the wall above it, with sliding clasps. On the other side of the window the moon shone brightly and the backyard stretched into a forest. She slid the window open and scurried out.

“Where’s she going?” The beast with Sandson’s voice asked.

“I’ll get her.” The other beast sounded like Randy.

You’ll try, but I’m free now and you can’t catch me!

The dew on the grass was cold on her bare feet as she sprinted across the backyard, approaching the thicket of trees. Balls of lights danced among the trees, illuminating her way.

“I’m calling an ambulance. Did she take what he did? If she did, you better find her soon!” Sanderson’s voice carried out the open window.

Marie ran.

  

* * * * *

 

“Wha…what are you doing here?” Marie asked as Randy slammed the door shut behind him. You need to get out, now.

He stamped the snow off his boots and shivered out of his coat, ignoring Marie as if he were returning home after a long day of work. When he finally looked up, he was smiling. What the fuck do you have to smile about?

“You bitch,” he said. Still smiling. “You think you can just leave me?”

Her eyes shot to the hallway on the other side of the station, willing Officer Sanderson to reappear. He didn’t. Randy stomped across the floor, his shoes squeaking with melted snow.

“You need to leave, Randy,” Marie said, trying to sound authoritative. It came out more like a whimper.

“No, I don’t. You think you’re the shit now, don’t you? Since you’ve gone clean. Think you can walk out on me, walk out on us”—he eyed her belly for that—“and that I’d just let you?” As he neared, she noticed his pupils were dilated and sweat trickled down his forehead, washing away the blood from the wound above his right eye he hastily patched with a band-aid.

“It’s not yours Randy, and if you believed me about this you would be just as freaked as I am right now,” she said.

The words had little effect, Randy approached with the same manic expression on his face.

“What are you doing here?” Finally. Officer Sanderson entered the room, carrying a heaping pile of blankets.

Randy’s demeanour shifted, his sneer turning into a smile, his hunched shoulders opening into a hug. He wrapped his arms around Marie and squeezed. “I’m so glad you’re OK. Thank you, Officer.”

Marie pushed him away, wriggling under his grasp. He gave Marie one final squeeze before releasing her, wiping away the fake tears rolling down his cheeks.

“Randy, why’d you come over here?” Sanderson asked.

“She’s safe! She left in such a hurry and then, well, I couldn’t find her.” He threw in another sob for good measure. “I followed her tracks until they disappeared, figured someone picked her up. Figured it’d be you,” Randy explained, stepping over to shake Officer Sanderson’s hand.

He didn’t return the favour. “You need to step away from her,” Officer Sanderson ordered. He stalked forward, putting the blankets on the desk and positioning himself between Randy and Marie.

“Nothing’s wrong, Bert! We just had a mild disagreement,” Randy explained. “I’m the one bleeding, let’s not dismiss that.”

“She doesn’t want to see you right now.”

“Let’s hear her say it,” Randy challenged.

Marie felt terrible but cast her eyes to the ground.

“You shouldn’t have come here,” Sanderson repeated through gritted teeth.

“You’ve seen what it’s doing outside. It would have been irresponsible to let her stay out there!”

“It was irresponsible to let her leave in the first place!” Officer Sanderson shot back.

Randy turned to Marie. “Listen, hun, I’m sorry for what I said and I forgive you for what happened, but it’s time to go home.” With his back to Officer Sanderson, the kindness in his features disappeared.

“You don’t have to act like this around him, you know,” Marie said, motioning to Officer Sanderson.

“What are you talking about? I said I was sorry. And I forgive you for hitting me with a vase. Now we should get back home before it gets real bad out there.”

“You don’t need to go anywhere with him,” Officer Sanderson advised.

Marie looked between both men, each on wildly different sides of the law. Ain’t you got yourself in a pickle. Just before she opened her mouth to speak, Randy pulled up the right side of his shirt, just so she could see, revealing the hilt of a Smith and Wesson. No doubt it was loaded.

“Officer Sanderson, I really do thank you for picking me up and all, but Randy’s right, we really should get home.”

“Marie, you don’t need to do this,” Officer Sanderson said, glaring at Randy.

“I know, but I want to. I’m tired, see, and grabbing all those blankets is sweet, but, uh, I’d prefer to be in my own bed.”

“And I’ll even let you sleep in, being out in the cold like that, you’re lucky you’re still alive!” Randy exclaimed. The scariest part was that his smile looked genuine.

Marie draped her coat over her shoulders and waddled toward the door. The sharp pain returned as she passed Sanderson’s desk. She put a palm on it to stop from falling.

“Are you OK?” Officer Sanderson was suddenly at her side, holding her arm. You should really let go.

“She’s fine, just a little woozy because she stood up too fast, right?” Randy said, appearing on her other side, shooing Officer Sanderson away.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m OK.” Marie brushed them both off.

The pain came back, but multiplied a thousandfold. She cried aloud, but gritted her teeth to stifle it. She leaned back against the table.

“You’re not looking so good,” Randy said.

“No shit I…” Marie replied as black crept in around the edges of her vision. “I…” If it weren’t for both Randy and Officer Sanderson, she would have fallen face first onto the linoleum, but they caught her, guiding her down gently.

“Call an ambulance!” Officer Sanderson shouted, although she didn’t know who he was yelling at.

 

* * * * *

 

“Marie? Marie!” Randy’s voice carried through the forest. 

But you’re not Randy. You’re something else and you’re coming for me and you’ll find that other thing and you’ll put me in jail and then nothing will end as it should. The moon provided enough light for Marie to traverse fallen branches and upraised roots. She crept slowly, remaining as silent as possible so as not to draw unwanted attention.

The night air was cool against her skin. A relief from the sweat that popped out of every pore. It even helped her forget about her brother, lying on the stained carpet in Randy’s basement, waiting for the ambulance to pump his stomach. What mattered was the here and now. Maybe you should let him catch you. Can’t be worse than usual.

The thought struck her as funny and she began to giggle. It was controllable at first, but grew into something hysterical when she looked up to the moon and saw it smiling down at her.

“Marie! I hear you!” 

She slapped her hands over her mouth, her shoulders continuing to bounce up and down.

“You’ll be fine, I just need to know where you are. You’re not in trouble!”

Yeah, right. I’m not in trouble with the law. Won’t stop you from slapping me around a bit though, won’t it? Marie found a path carved through the forest. As she followed it, a sign indicated Gates’ Waterfall.

Water, that’s what you need. She continued to pant like a dog and imagined her internal water supply like an empty reservoir, drained to the last drop and the machinery coughing and sputtering on fumes. No matter how deep or steady she wanted to control her breathing, it never felt like she had enough.

“Where you headed? You know I can hear you!” Randy’s voice sounded muffled and far away.

The world was at once an over-exposed blinding bulb and a pitch black cellar, pulsing with every step. Marie stopped to glance behind her and saw Beast-Randy, a hulking form between two trees, staring in the opposite direction. Marie ducked behind a tree, stealing a final glance. He was at once a huge, snarling snout in front of her and a tiny spec on the horizon. Then he moved on, his feet crunching the leaves before fading into the trill of the crickets. She was alone, again.

A light headed euphoria coursed through her veins. She was unstoppable. The trees, even in darkness, looked the richest colours of red and yellow she ever saw, the leaves on the ground calling out in pain and terror that they were separated from such majestic beauties. Her breath came back and, before she knew it, she was running, leaves crunching in a sweet melody. The song of the forest. She giggled again.

“Hey!” Randy’s voice sounded ahead of her.

She slowed her pace.

“Hey, c’mon, enough jokin’ around Marie!” His voice was louder now, accompanied by the luminance of a flashlight, its beam so dispersed by the time it got to her that she was no more than part of the shadows cast by the surrounding trees.

You should just go to him, you won’t be able to run forever. 

She never got to make the decision.

A bright light blinded everything in her path, choking her off from the flashlight, the moonlight, the twinkle of the stars. It forced Marie to shut her eyes, shielding them with her forearms for extra measure. Even that did nothing to dilute the bright light. It was as if a giant floodlight was aimed straight at her from only a few feet away. An auditory signal joined the bright light: a low, consistent thrum like blood rushing through veins.

“Marie, thank God!” Randy, normal Randy, shouted, but Marie barely heard it.

All she heard was the light, followed by the sensation that her feet were no longer on the ground. I’m flying! Randy, look! The light lifted her up.

 

* * * * *

 

Movement. A gentle rocking back and forth interrupted by an occasional bump. You’re in a car. Or van. She tried to open her eyes; couldn’t. She was frozen in place, rooted to a hard surface like a tree to the land.

“Her blood pressure is at 145 over 98 and rising.” A gentle female voice broke through the steady thrum of the engine. The whoop of a siren followed it.

An ambulance. You’re in an ambulance. The beep of a heart rate monitor trilled in the background. They must be taking you to the hospital. It’s happening.

“Is she going to be all right?” A voice she hoped not to hear: Randy. 

“Keep quiet. You’re lucky you’re even in here,” another voice. Hard-edged but soft. Officer Sanderson.

Marie tried to move again but only managed to wiggle her pinky back and forth.

“She’s awake!” Randy again, a higher pitch to his voice, as if he were startled. Or scared.

A moment later, a bright light shone on the other side of her right eyelid, revealing the veins and capillaries running through the thin flap of skin. It was followed by a thumb and forefinger prying her eyelid open, the thumb pushing down while the finger pulled up. The light assaulted her cornea but, as much as it hurt, she couldn’t force her eyelid shut. The woman’s fingers remained stubbornly on either side until they shifted to her left eye to put it through a similar torture. “She’s not awake. Must have been an automatic reaction.”

“How’s the baby?” Randy again.

“Vitals are stable,” the woman replied.

The ambulance suddenly swerved, swishing Marie back and forth on the gurney. A strong hand clamped onto her chest, preventing her from spilling over the side. She hoped it wasn’t Randy’s.

“What the hell?” the woman shouted.

“Sorry,” a fourth voice, one Marie didn’t recognize, spoke from even further above Marie’s head. The driver. “Damn deer ran out in front. Nearly hit it.”

“Knew I should have drove as an escort,” Officer Sanderson stated.

“No, then you’d be in the back too. We’re gonna be fine, we’ll get there. Just can’t go too fast,” the driver responded.

“Did you miss that part about her blood pressure rising? We might not have much time before the baby comes,” the woman said.

“Gonna do my best,” the driver replied.

The abrupt swerve provided more than a scare for the three conscious inhabitants of the back, it also jolted Marie’s nervous system—she shifted her head to the right and forced her eyes open. She had a clear view out the back window, seeing darkness punctuated with strobing red and white on the flecks of falling snow. Officer Sanderson sat on a bench beside the door, staring at a notepad in his hands. He looked up and, when their eyes met, he shivered in shock.

“She’s awake!” he proclaimed, his head snapping back to the person above Marie.

A face entered her vision from above, peering over her forehead. It was an older woman, deep lines framing her cheeks. A smile broke through her sharp features, although, being upside down, it gave the impression of a grotesque frown. A nametag on the left of her chest read Katherine Peters. “Hi dear, can you hear me?”

Marie nodded, feeling Katherine’s leathery palms bracing her head on either side.

“Can she talk?” Randy again.

Would you just shut up? She wanted to speak but no words came out. Her tongue felt like a giant slug.

“It’s OK, don’t force anything. You need to rest,” Katherine said, the smile still frowning at her.

I don’t want to rest!

All thought was forced out by searing pain in her midsection. Oh God, there’s no more time!

“What was that dear? Are you OK?” Katherine asked, her brow furrowing.

“What’s wrong with her? Help her!” Randy cried.

Marie’s breath quickened.

“We need to regulate your breathing, OK? Squeeze my hand every time you feel pain,” Katherine explained, her eyes suggesting she knew what was going on. Contractions.

Marie nodded and did as she was asked. Or at least tried to, taking in long, slow gulps of air instead. She squeezed Katherine’s hand when she felt the sharp pain and then released it.

“There’s no time. We’ll have to do this the old fashioned way,” Katherine said, and then added, “move.”

Randy appeared at her feet, but shifted in front of Officer Sanderson as Katherine jostled to that position. She felt her legs lift on their own accord and saw she wasn’t wearing any pants underneath the sheet. Officer Sanderson looked in her direction and then quickly snapped his attention back to his notebook in hand.

“How far are we from the hospital, Charles?” Katherine shouted toward the front and presumably the driver, Charles.

“It’s a blizzard out here ma’am, not going too—” the next words were cut from his mouth as the ambulance suddenly stopped. It wasn’t the result of a swerve like before, with the four of them in the back thrown side to side, but the brakes skidding on an icy blacktop. The sudden change in momentum sent Officer Sanderson flying forward, where he collided with Randy and both went sprawling to the ground. Katherine wrapped her hands around the gurney railing and remained at Marie’s feet, jaw clenched as she braced herself. But the force was too great and she went flying to the side. Marie’s head was thrust into the pillow.

Then the world turned sideways, followed by a blast of cold air as the windshield shattered. The right side of the ambulance became the floor and Marie slid toward it, along with all the loose items on the counter. Before she even reached it, the ambulance turned again and the ceiling became the new floor. She fell out of the gurney, landing hard on her side before the ambulance continued it’s roll and she wound up on her back.

The shouts and shrieks from the others joined the screech of metal. The front of the ambulance continued to skid downward, sending snow and cold air in through the exposed windshield. When they finally came to a stop, snow blanketed Marie’s left arm and the sheet was twisted around her right leg. Her side hurt, her head hurt. Her belly hurt. She looked up toward the cab but all she could see was a wall of white.

 

* * * * *

 

Marie was lying on a hard surface in a room lit so bright that she couldn’t tell where the floor ended and the walls began. Everything was white. A hard, plastic-like substance covered her mouth and contoured around her nose, like a gas mask, except fitted so close to her face that she couldn’t see it when she looked down. Her heart pounded in her chest. Where the fuck are you?

She turned to the side in a vain attempt to glimpse her surroundings, but all she could see was the smooth metal of the surface she was lying on. How did you get here? You were running away from Randy. He was looking for you because you took too many pills. Had she been able to adjust the fine muscles in her face, she would have screamed. You’re tripping.

The whiteness around her suddenly changed colour, taking on soft red hues, like an alarm flashing through fog. A sound accompanied it, indecipherable and guttural.

“Hello?” she managed to say, her voice coming out barely above a whisper, muffled by the mask. “Who’s there? I hear you!” Her eyes darted across the pulsing red mist. There was no response. Then, materializing out of the whiteness, a shape appeared to her right. It was big, or at least it seemed big as she lay on the table, veiled by the mist. It’s size could have been another trick of the lighting.

This is Randy’s idea of a joke. Or Gary’s. Regulating her breathing did little to calm her. “Hello?” she said again, except—you’re not speaking. The mask held her lips shut. You’re just thinking. And someone—or something—is reacting to it.

The mass in the mist approached, its form taking on more structure. It was still blurry and, no matter how many times she blinked, she couldn’t bring it into focus. She reached out instead, in part to see if it was real, in part to provide context for its size. It was at least ten feet tall, but slender. It resembled a humanoid form, standing upright but with too many appendages. Three arms ran along each side, although one of the pairs was too high and thinner than the others, sprouting from what could be its shoulders. Almost like antennae. The other two pairs were thicker, stretching out of the side and joined more times than they should, giving the ability to seemingly collapse in on themselves. The head remained behind that veiled barrier, which maybe wasn’t a bad thing.

She squirmed on the bed as one of the arms reached toward her, the end splaying out into an appendage that had six off-shoots, which could be called fingers if they didn’t look like worms. Each one had a little hole in the tip like a gaping mouth. The being lowered the appendages to Marie’s arm, the mouths attaching just above her wrist.

A searing pain coursed through her veins and, at the same time, the alien-being screamed a guttural roar. It filled Marie’s head as the blurriness around her sharpened.  It’s the drugs leaving your system. That woozy, weightlessness departed as she settled onto the bed, pain sprouting in her shoulders from resting on the cold metal for so long. The scream continued, gaining clarity as her sobriety returned. She wanted to cover her ears, the throbbing in her head becoming worse than the pain in her arm.

Finally, after what seemed an eternity, the pain subsided, along with the deafening shriek. Marie felt better. Alert. She focused on the being in front of her, but it remained fuzzy even in her hyper alert state. She could hear the blood coursing through her veins. Looking down, she saw a black burn mark on her arm or, rather, six of them, where the appendages made contact with her skin. How did you do that? 

The being slipped back in the void, as if that were the answer. Marie wanted to follow, but her arms and legs weren’t cooperating. Her head, clear of the drugs, began to take on the heaviness of sleep instead. You drugged me with something else. You cleaned out my system and now you’re making me sleep. She tried to fight it.

A shadow approached, this time from the opposite side. It took all her effort to roll her head. A being that looked exactly like the first one—could have been the first one—reached out that long tentacle. But it was different; it looked slimy, covered in some filmy substance. It didn’t splay out into six small fingers but remained a single prong, tapering to a point.

“Get that away from me!” she sent the message from her mind, but her warning had no effect.

Think! You have to get out of here, there has to be something you can do! But there wasn’t. She could barely keep her eyes open as the tentacle approached, hovering over her arm, moving above her belly, and then further down.

Her eyes widened as she anticipated the pain that would come and, for a split second, the haze around the room vanished. Beyond her feet, she could see that she was in a large circular room, broken up into individual pie fragments that had a similar bed to the one she occupied. The middle of the room remained hazy, with one of the beings inside it, observing. In each of the beds around her, she saw another person lying there, immobile. Frozen. They were all women. She couldn’t count how many, nor how may of the indistinct figures stood in shrouds of mist beside them. And then, just like that, it disappeared, like a button was pushed to bring back the fog.

The tentacle lowered and the pain began.

 

* * * * *

 

“Charles? Charles?” Katherine called out, her words coming out slurred.

Marie looked up to see Katherine and Officer Sanderson digging through the barrier of snow between the back of the ambulance and the cab. Yeah, worry about the guy that crashed the ambulance, not the pregnant woman.

Katherine gasped—they found the driver. Or part of him, at least, judging by how quickly they piled snow back into the opening.

“Oh my god,” Katherine muttered.

She’s talking about me. Marie turned to her belly, expecting to see something grotesque there—but there was nothing out of the ordinary. It wasn’t her, Katherine was staring at something lying on the floor near the back of the ambulance. Marie couldn’t see what it was and when she shifted to get a better view, a big hand pressed her down.

“It’s OK, you don’t need to see that,” Officer Sanderson said, pain in his voice.

“What? See what?” she asked.

“Are you OK? Does anything hurt?” he asked instead.

“You’re not answering my question, what’s over there?” She needed to know, although the lack of Randy’s incessant comments suggested she already did.

“I don’t know what happened but…” his voice trailed off.

“Oh,” Marie said. Randy’s dead. She wanted to smile and laugh and scream at the top of her lungs now that she was finally free of him. She missed him at the same time and thought this was all a joke.

She rolled onto her side, pushing up with enough force to swat Officer Sanderson’s hand away, and gazed behind her. Katherine stood hunched over a body, working furiously at resuscitating it. “For Christs’ sake, you gotta get her back on the table.”

Strong hands guided her back down—just in time—she clenched her teeth during another contraction. A moan escaped her lips. “Did I hurt you?” Officer Sanderson asked, releasing his hands.

“No, my,” she rubbed her belly.

Officer Sanderson shot a worried glance to Katherine, she sighed. “I…he’s…”

“He’s dead?” Marie asked. Not like this.

Officer Sanderson met her gaze and nodded, before averting his eyes. Marie felt a tear roll down her cheek; she couldn’t help it. “How?”

“I’m sorry, dear. I think the gurney…” Katherine let her voice trail off, wiping bloody hands on a towel and taking an antiseptic cloth out of an over-turned container.

Why did this happen now! Why is this happening now! Another wave of pain.

“Okay, we need to do this,” Katherine said. Marie met her gaze, spotting a thin cut above her left eye. “And I need you to go get help,” Katherine barked to Officer Sanderson. “We can’t be that far from the road.”

“Help? In this weather?” Officer Sanderson asked.

“Yeah, hopefully there will be at least one other idiot out there. After I deliver the girl we’re going to need to get to a hospital as soon as possible.”

Officer Sanderson stood with his mouth open. He wasn’t used to receiving orders. But one look at Marie and the sweat matting her hair to her forehead, her legs splayed to either side as Katherine positioned herself between them, and he nodded. He scrambled to his feet and pushed the back doors open.

“Quick! Don’t let the heat out!” Katherine added as Sanderson slipped outside and slammed the doors shut behind him.

“OK, now, we need to get this baby out, don’t we? Are the contractions still coming?” Katherine asked, turning her gaze on Marie.

“What do you think?”

“Then on the count of three, I need you to push,” she said.

Marie took in three big breaths as Katherine started her countdown. When she reached one, Marie pushed with everything she had. This isn’t going to work. It’s not a baby in there.

“You stopped,” Katherine commented. “I can see the baby. Her head is crowning, I need you to push a little more.”

It was a good thing Katherine focused on the baby, because Marie scrunched her face in confusion. A head? Like a normal baby head? Maybe Randy was right and the whole thing was a bad trip. Oh God! Randy! Marie pushed again, the pain nearing unbearable levels.

“That’s it, nice and easy,” Katherine cooed as she readied a blanket near Marie’s feet. “Just one more time, okay?”

Marie forced a nod. Not like I have any other option. This is going fast though, isn’t it? Too fast. She pushed, clenching her teeth and gripping the sides of the gurney. It was followed by an odd sensation, something she wasn’t expecting. A longing for what was inside her—that it’s existence was somehow keeping her alive. Next came the biggest wallop of a hangover she had ever experienced, as if the baby was keeping the effects of withdrawal and all the drugs she had taken in her life at bay and, suddenly, they all came back to hit her at once. She moaned as she fell back into the bed.

“Congratulations!” Katherine’s voice broke through the fog. “A beautiful girl!”

Marie kept her eyes closed. She couldn’t look at it in case something was wrong.

“Marie?” Katherine’s voice again, filled with concern, the sing-songiness dissipating. “Marie, are you with me? You have a girl!” The excitement this time felt forced.

Marie opened her eyes long enough to see Katherine staring at her, rocking her baby. She couldn’t maintain her gaze through heavy eyelids. The pain she was experiencing was the worst she experienced her life. The baby’s cries were a dull sound in the background. She closed her eyes again.

“Oh dear,” Katherine said, scrambling at Marie’s side. She felt a small baby lie across her chest. It felt good. She opened her eyes again. “You need to keep it together Marie, just for a little while longer,” Katherine said, but Marie didn’t know if she could. She wanted to get some sleep.

“Ella,” Marie said as she held the girl. She looked normal. She looked fine. It was all part of a bad trip.

Ella cried in Marie’s arms as snow beat against the ambulance, sending spurts of cold in through the smashed windshield. Then Marie closed her eyes and, this time, she never opened them.

 

* * * * *

 

Officer Sanderson saw two headlights approaching as he stood in the middle of the road. He held a flashlight in one hand and brought his arms up and down in big, swooping gestures. The headlights transformed into a large semi that skidded to a stop twenty feet past him.

“Thank god!” Officer Sanderson said, running to meet the driver. He was a lanky man with a stained baseball cap and the remnants of a burger clinging to a scruffy beard.

“What you doin’ in the middle of the road mister? You wanna get run over?” the man’s voice was higher pitched than he expected.

“I’m Officer Sanderson, we need help. Our ambulance is down there,” Officer Sanderson said, pointing with his flashlight down the hill, where he illuminated the ambulance. For a second, short enough that he felt his eyes were playing tricks on him, he thought he saw a clear bubble around the ambulance, as if an invisible forcefield were keeping the snow from falling onto it. Then it disappeared.

“Let’s go then!” The truck driver said, appearing at his side.

When Sanderson looked back at the ambulance, the bubble was gone.